The next morning she woke up and asked who I was and where she was.
i was just texting to let you know that my facebook chat is working again so you can talk to me more. please talk to me more.
I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
he was so drunk I had to hold him up and he started crying when he heard an ambulance siren and said "is that for me?"
Do you ever just think "I could really go for a good 30 minute blowjob". I do. Everytime jill smiles.
still drunk. talking shit to the doc drawing my blood. this has no upside
Soooo, if his status went from married to single and he deleted all the pictures of his kids does that mean he's up for dibbs?
No i peed with you in the toilet. The guy I high fived was mid pee in front of the urinal
He asked me to spit in his mouth. I did. Never let me hook up with this guy again.
This lumberjack with a huge beard is doing his group presentation in a dirty t shirt that says "I'm only 2 girls short of a threesome"
I couldn't finish the episode and had to lay down because the snapple commercial with the mustache was blowing my mind
Currently tripping balls and watching Pink Floyd the wall and I'm crying during it. If this isn't a self realization then I don't know what to tell you.
my nurturing instincts told me to take his clothes off
we thought it would be safer to lock you in the car alone downtown than take you back home to pass out
would it be awkward if i bring my husband?
only if i fuck you in the bathroom while he's paying the check
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