At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
I had a talk with my mom about respecting myself and not acting like a whore so she will rip my nose ring out if she somehow sees that picture
do you want me to make hamburgers?
i'm vegan
i'll put lettuce on them
All I know is I woke up next to her beside the toilet
She somehow inhaled a tack last night, she's having surgery today.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
i'm in that phase where i'll swallow anything except food
I don't always steal things but when i do it is a six foot five dos equis guy
Yes ma'am. At least you're a warning story I can tell to my kids in the future
I woke up this morning to my house being turned into a bad European dance club at 8:30am. Do you know what "UNS UNS UNS" sounds like at 8:30am? Murder. It sounds like murder.
Some chick asked if she could eat me because I'm dressed as a taco. I introduced her to RJ. Best Wingman.
next time we make out at a concert please try to refrain from screaming out our hotel room number.. the amount of guys that knocked on our door after you passed out was ridiculous
It's been two dates and she just invited me to her aunts funeral. I can't even. Who the fuck does that? I need to drink I'm coming to get you in 5
He sent me a website link to GIF on Snapchat. I don’t think he understands how Social Media works.
Fuck this virus. We’re finally back on campus but the bars suck parties are banned sports are canceled we eat in our rooms and can’t fucking hangout with anyone. I’m tired of virtual classes and involuntary celibacy
OMG IKR! It’s not college unless we’re puking in a toilet wondering if we’re pregnant or just hungover!
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