sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
are you going to last longer than 15 seconds
nope
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
is it customary for a bride to wear white even if she's a whore? i feel tie-dye would have been more accurate
You are like a prophet. It's amazing how many people you convince to be lesbians.
Seriously man, I'm worried that my dick's going to fall off someday if I keep this up...
he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero
just passed out again, this time at a subway. On a positive not they gave me a free sandwich, pretty sure out pity but at this point i don't care
Freshmen girls are like potato chips you can't have just one.
Tell him I'm the girl who was excited he spoke English. Then ask him where he picked me up from.
I wasn't a groupie because I didn't carry his guitar home
our friendships a beautiful delicate flower...that has been crushed by peni
HOW DO YOU FORGET TO FINISH WINE
You started pulling out condoms from your fanny pack and threw them at all the couples on the beach
He put a doughnut around his dick and I ate it. What can I say. It was a good fucking night.
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