does the new i-phone have a pregnancy test app?
shouldn't i get a discount if shes pregnant?
just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
Ryan Howard.... the only guy who struck out more than me this weekend
All I remember was the chick screaming "don't hookup with him! His dick's the size of a cucumber"
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
Watching water boil has never been so amazing. I love wake-and-bakes.
It's a 2 hour train ride a 7 in the morning, of course we're bringing alcohol
Congratulations on your lack of fetus.
I was jumping over your garbage can screaming "Im a snow cat!!" ..Who wouldn't want to see that?
God gave me a talent besides one night stands. I feel like I should use it
I think the blind guy i flirt with on a regular basis is starting to realize he's old enough to be my father. I can't tell if he's into it or not.
I shouldn't be allowed to be in america for NYE... or any major holiday for that matter
She asked me if I could do that to her every single time. I said nope. sometimes it's better.
Randomize
