I lost of the blow last night. Found it later in my bag labeled Fairy Dust.
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
He adopted an old drug sniffing dog so that he won't lose his weed around the house anymore. It works.\n
Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
There's still flour in my hair. And I don't even want to know what the neighbors think happened infront of my house.
you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love
Get in your clown car, pick up everyone you know, and head to the park. drunk Sledding grand prix tonight. winner takes home the leftover beer
my neighbors having band practice on sunday morning is a message from the universe that I should stop drinking
Just checked in with my friend who walked in on us. He thinks you two had a spiritual connection and he's bugging out
He was also rolling face on molly so his perception of divinity might be slightly off
I fell asleep with a half eating burrito in my hand and woke up to cat vomit with burrito in it.
Is there anything more American than getting day drunk and watching Hulk Hogan promos?
Things he has managed to cum on so far on spring break: my bikini, my back-up bikini, three of my four bras, two pairs of panties, four beds, six chairs, the floor of several hotel rooms, the window/door to the balcony from both sides, my tits, my face, my stomach, his stomach, my ass, his best friend's girlfriend's face, and his best friend's dick.
Just FYI spring break is over and you're supposed to be back in class but hey sounds like you had your orgy so congrats.
He stumbled out of their hotel room and yelled, "I'M ON A STATEWIDE TOUR. I'VE BEEN IN KENTUCKY AND OKLAHOMA."
If the people you’re with use the word tequila in a sentence with phrases like hair of the dog or breakfast of champions...run awsy
So do you guys remember Danny from Tinder?
Sorry I only remember personality traits, not names.
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