It was awkward until we both realized our obsessions with harry potter and sangrias were the same. Now were in love.
You need tk get a life and stop texting me about fictional characters. I don't give a shit.
I refuse to have another spring break doomed by pregnancy.
all i wanna do is drink skittled vodka, fuck my gf, and pass out in my neighbors hot tub naked
Just made out with a girl I dated in high school, and she told me her girlfriend likes me. I like where this is going.
It's awesome, he has so much more free time now that he's not screwing other girls behind my back
Just so you know, classy bitches change the morning after in a CVS bathroom.
My heart is swelling with pride right now. I fucking love you.
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
one renamed every person in my phone 'I lpvw tewqils', so it would really help me out if you could text me your name. Happy sunday!
He bought me a burrito. I introduced him as "Horse-Dicked Jake" all night. My debt has been repaid.
The 4th is next week. If we don't get to a new level of high, we will be letting down George Washington.
I'M SO LONELY THAT I TEXTED THE FRESHMAN
Thats not real though. Slash there are other extenuating circumstances to lead me to believe dick is wanted
HOLY FUCK I SPELLED EXTENUATING RIGHT ON THE FIRST TRY. IM THE BEST DRUNK NA
I SHOULD NOT BE HAVING AN EXISTENTIAL CRISIS OVER PIZZA
No, no... It was great. I feel like my liver took a vodka shower and washed it's hair with pabst
last night I learned that if you try to buy tacos in this town, that you will be stopped by three cop cars with breathalizers
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