I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
i think you're the only person in the world who masturbates to food network.
If a young child walked up to you and grabbed your penis, you'd feel violated too.
Not sure if you carved a butthole or vagina in that pumpkin but that didn't stop high Phil from mounting. My study group is horrified.
I am convinced that after two dates and a few adult sleepovers that he still doesn't know my name.
I just spent a pre-4th of july celebration riding in a raft being towed by a car through a town that I've never heard of handing out flyers for a river rafting company that I never knew existed. Good night.
He tried to stop traffic by waving his half eaten pizza at cars.... And we were stupid enough to cross .....??!!!
Maybe. I want to have sex at the fire station, most likely on one of the trucks. I wonder if I can finagle that before I tire of the spelling and grammatical errors in his texts.
Jesus, I think this onesie was designed to keep me from masturbating.
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
this is the last time i am going to a 7am booty call
Things he's good at: oral sex and geometry. Things he's not good at: actual sex.
He still want's to kick my ass for fucking his sister, probably a bad idea to leave the bar with his ex...
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
IT WAS A FUCKING ELEPHANT I SWESR!!!!!
Nathan, I haven't spoken to you in 12 years and it's 6am. Kindly fuck off.
Randomize
