She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
totally watching dr. phil and getting eaten out right now. be jealous.
I think my goal in life now is to be a Trending topic on Twitter after I die.
Everyone is hammered wasted already...young, old, the dying, babies...we got them all
Why does it always end up with me crying in my car.
My wedding band has saved me from at least four cases of herpes tonight.
His dick is longer than my foot and I'm a size 9. I'm literally kicking myself in the vagina
I found him stumbling up to our building with a solo cup under his arm. . . He told me it was his favourite thing ever. He also told me hes never been drunk before.
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
Speaking of church, everyone showed up to lunch in the dining hall in their Sunday best and I walk in looking homeless bc I just got out of bed. I hate this school.
Sarah is throwing up still and I'm eating salad with my fingers
Well. At least he's a gentleman. A gentleman satanist.
I don't care how hot she was. She didn't like Scooby Doo and I don't fuck with that.
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
For a second I thought he was going to give me an intervention
You can't give interventions in a bar!
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