Crap im kindd 0f drunkk we just hooked up in a mcdonalds parking lot but i dont know why how we are here
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
Wait, we're on the hunt for addys and explosives. They're both in this house somewhere.
he somehow instantly knew i was from vermont.
it probably had something to do with chasing your soco with maply syrup.
holy fuck that shirt looks so good on him, it was like he was born with it on. that shirt deserves a blow
I told him if he went to see magic mike with me I'd cover his eyes during the penis parts
It was an "I snuck in through the window at 5am with my underwear in my pocket" kind of night.
Just woke up, shitty hungover, and realized that every article of clothing I slept in was backwards, bra included. Fuck you, gin. Fuck you.
Hahaha idk what's worse your life or my hangover.
I feel like a bottle of fireball rented a bull dozer and ran me over until I was left without a shred of my dignity
At least they play good movies in the waiting room of the pregnancy resource center.
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
She is crazy bro, she'll kiss me after eating her ass but looses her fucking mind if I double dip a french fry in "our" ketchup!
I walked in the kitchen and heard her saying "We could have been so good together" as she caressed an egg with her cheek.
My GF, FWB and Side piece are all booty calling me. I’m a victim of my sexual success
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