So i got in my car, the seats are leaned back, and soft soul music is playing. Wtf happened last night.
went to library to start paper due tomorrow & took those orange addys u gave. now realizing they were ur xanax. completely fucked and going to fail, but calmly at peace with the situation.
She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
I'm at work, and just realized I the beer smell I keep getting random whiffs of is my bra. I fail at life.
i would really love it if at least once per weekend i did not wake up to you half naked passed out on the floor
I'm trying to decide whether it's worth it to masturbate in this gas station bathroom
He left his phone. Turns out he;s been sexting with some girls who can't spell. Time to break out the herpes scare.
She's blowing me while I'm watching air jaws. I love shark week.
So I told him "To answer your question yes I am naked making pizza pops in your kitchen"
No one needs to know about the barren wasteland that is my vag. Sometimes i visualize my cervix rocking back and forth wondering where everybody went.
I just pictured that. It's reading a book.
His dog ate the vibrator. The WHOLE vibrator. We spend the morning after trying to make it vomit up the battery. Why does this always happen to me?
Although the guy I'm messing around with just offered to let me be his rich brother's sugar baby
The squirrels were at the front door. Dude I swear..
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
Laying in bed naked is fun. I now see why guys love boobs... They're sooo bouncy! This long distance relationship is really killing my sex life.
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