My mom says you aren't allowed to eat doritos at my house
we were both hunting dick last night. it ended terribly for both of us.
I just realized that all of my cardio comes from dancing on tables.
5th glass of wine. There's pictures of Jesus everywhere. It's like you're constantly reminded of your sins here.
I'm wearing cowboy boots and showing way too much cleavage to be in a place with no jaeger.
Sorry really high. We have no lighter so we're lighting the bowl with rolled up paper towels lit by candle which also lit with a rolled up paper towel that we lit with the stove eye
Both his mom and his sister were hitting on me when I stopped by today. He isn't a real friend anyway, right?
just watched my roommates get stoned and jury rig a pulley system to pass the bowl back and forth across the room.
Do you think you're physically and mentally capable of killing me? Because I'd really appreciate it.
Because you work where i will be drunk tonight I'm asking you. Is a shirt required on Halloween?
I cried over the lack of milkshakes I've consumed in the last month
I haven't included my nuts in a shave since the Shaq/kobe Lakers era. I gave my self the ol full court press in order to change the tempo.
He went down on me for an hour and a half. He needs to get promoted more often.
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
I remember turning to Jon after doing a line of coke and saying "I was a Girl Scout"
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