Grow some girl-balls and come out already
are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
its like he missed a chap in the "being a guy" handbook and read the bible instead
dude your girlfriend is running naked down the hall with a raw chicken taped to her stomach saying this is what I'll look like pregnant...run far far away
My dildo fell into the bathtub. It sounded like a chainsaw.
he was once again the drunkest girl at the party
Drinking ketchup directly out of the bottle does not make it tomato juice.
I feel like we have both made good decisions regarding our vaginas lately
Just so you know, if I get bored tomorrow I WILL pretend to get drunk in the bathroom and crash the whole thing
Nothing says "forever alone" like receiving a friendship bracelet from your parents.
I'll be thirty in eight months. I think my goal is too stop changing my pants in the parking lot at work by then.
That's true because who the fuck doesn't love Harry Potter and beer
I asked him to get me another beer, and he started making muffins.
He ate me out for an eternity. Like fell asleep, woke up, and he was still doing it.
i keep smelling vagina and donuts, which pretty much sumarises this morning. happy birthday.
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