Walking by Farrand Field is better than a porno right now.
he chased her out of the bar yelling "TAKE MY VIRGINITY" and i havent seen her since
Thanks for stealing lime trees for me at 4:00 am. We're well on our way to having sustainable supplies for mojitos this summer.
i'm not the one sitting naked in my room playing with my boobs and a cat.
Idk. I woke up marinating in beer on my beanbag. Idk what you mightve done.
The least you could do before I go into your room is throw away the condom wrapper from the other girl I know you're banging.
Every bathroom has like throw up and like bagels in it. Richie didn't even have bagels.
I just tried to make cleaning gasoline off your shoes with toilet paper in the Chemistry Building bathroom look normal. I failed.
I forgot I did whipits. Probably because my brain cells were killed from the whipits
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
I don't remember... but I heard a cop threatened to pepper spay my dick
You fell asleep on the toilet and he was like uh should I take her off?
I wanna say I regret bonging a beer while having sex with Mike, but it helped me get thru it.
I just paid my school fees like a real adult who doesn't get accidentally drunk on a Tuesday night
Babe, holding my hair while i blow you doesn't count as being romantic
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