Yeah i wasn't gonna go out but then i was like im not gonna get my dick wet stayin at home studying
Thats my favorite, when ex girlfriends become XL ex girlfriends
is this the sara with the beer cane?
Found a cheerleading trophy in my shower this morning. Explain.
I had sex on an exercise ball. The inevitable has occurred.
when i went to the store to buy my pregnancy test they were giving carnations to all the moms and they gave me one and said "just in case"
Just had to find a way to explain to the border patrol that we were coming into canada "for about a half hour to have one last under 21 drink before kendals birthday at midnight." He said ok and told us where the closest bar was. Nice man.
He just sent me a picture of himself naked while cooking pancakes and he made the caption "bitchin' in the kitchen"
Fighting the urge to throw up all over my little brothers jr high basketball bench. Welcome home aaron
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
Omg, those nutella cakes are heavenly, like licking the nipples of a muscular black Jesus.
Let me get this straight, you're telling me to lower my standards? Even though last week you told me I don't have any..?
all night she kept rolling over and mumbling something about wanting an extendable retractable urethra.
I had a dream that I got you so wet that you flooded my apartment
I've never been so excited to be bleeding from my vagina.
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