You were right, I'm so drunk and I want to eat the shit out of my vanilla cupcake candle it smells delish
Experience is the best teacher
So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
I must have had a great time last night.. I woke up with coconut oil all over my glasses
my sober ride is dancing w/ a fat girl. i might be awhile
He fucked a girl named Oreo... He deserved syphilis.
We fucked to showtunes. Never going out with a theatre major ever again.
I really like her...she always overpays me for xanax and still feels the need to fuck me to make up for it....
How much more is Amanda Bynes going to rip out our hearts?!?!?
But really- as the voice of your vagina I am BEGGING you to do it. If not for yourself than for your poor innocent puss
SKIIIIIIIIIIII, trip mo foes! Let-ith the epic- ness begin ith. Heroes go forth, nAy Sayers fuckin die. This is for the good of mankind! See you on the morrow
Apologies to the number who did not expect to get this but certainly be jealous of us.
75% of my food budget goes to wine, the rest to chips and salsa.
You informed me your place was now a nudist colony and unless I was there to drink schnapps with the cat I had to strip.
I'm texting you know although you won't get this until you wake up. the only reason you are strapped to your bed is because you were trying to fly out your window.
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
Randomize
