I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
You did not just nickname me "Nipples".
is it bad that I only want to go to my boyfriends house bc I want to see his roomate walk around with his shirt off?
just spent about 3 1/2 hours looking for a dollar so I can buy weed.
suggestion: become a stripper.
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
I was going to call you an awful person for that. but then i realized we're both awful people.
Really* awful people.
we should hire that guy that makes pancakes that we met last weekend for our next party. He can feed us, and regulate!
This is what we get for YOLOing our way to obesity
A guy is going to be inside me and I'm gunna start singing "I am stuck on your penis, cause your penis is stuck in meeee!"
I saw a kid peeing outback so I yelled "you have a small pecker, but its ok cuz when life gives you lemons..." and proceeded to throw lemons at him
smoked some of that legal weed last night, felt like God himself legit bent me over his knee and spanked my ass. Never again..never.
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
God I need to stop before there's a picture of my dick on my mom's phone.
I'm just like... Utterly amazed that we're still alive at this point. Who'da thunk it....
You know what sucks about being drunk at 4 pm? Not a god damn thing.
Randomize
