i permit you to call me
if you take his cock out, you have to give him a bj. it's like giving a moose a muffin.
i hate when u poo a lot and when u wipe theres no poopy residue on the TP. it makes me feel like my butt hole is hiding something from me. just had 2tell sum1.
I swear this girl is like a Cross between Danny Devito and Anne Heche....the Lesbian Years.
I just fell down my stairs. I know that you are 6 hours away but please come pick me up. I promise I will still be here on the stairs.
she got to the point every few minutes she checked to see if her boobs were still there.
He just keeps repeating "this isn't my bagel".. i'm worried for his safety
You kept showing everyone at the bar your bra to prove it matched your shoes.
Due to the events of st patties day last year I created a moral and ethical policy so that I won't get kicked out of the bar again. It mostly consists of not wearing pants so then I don't take them off at the bar.. and subsequently get kicked out.
You need to call dibs on the blond with the tits. It's your birthday.
Haha hell yea
Because if someone gets to see those.. It should be you. It's like God telling you Happy Birthday.
We can Fuck in the shower to save time
And this is why I like you. You're so damn innovative.
Balls deep in an Orange is the New Black marathon. Bring food and drugs.
I came in shy and timid. By the end of the night I hulked out broke two lamps, their coffee table, some plates, and still had sex.
So, if you eat too many protein bars, you will shit your pants. This I learnt today..... at work.
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
Randomize
