I just changed her number in my phone to "You Wouldn't If You were Sober"
Do vagina's smell?
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
would he be offended if i told him that "national coming out day" is october 11. thats subtle enough right?
WHY are the edges of my bra charred???
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
it's like getting dryhumped by a chainsaw in the very best possible way
Also I stopped in the middle of the road and put my hazards on because BUNNIES WERE PLAYING
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
My brother walked up to us as we were making out and was like "hey man, go to town!" and winked
I heard from the downstairs bathroom "WHY CAN'T I WIPE MY ASS IN PEACE!" and a pisscrate of glass bottles breaking
I need vodka mixed w a bit of holy water right now
yo dude not sure how this happened but im drunk at your house eating burritos with your mom and sister. hope you're having fun in new zealand
i don't know when underwear became an acceptable clothing choice for parties, but god help me i hope this isn't a passing trend.
The hump and dump is a beautiful thing
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