I saw a sign that said worlds largest frying pan next exit. Way to do your fucking part Iowa.
just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
he like comes into my room and is like..."can you fix my pants" and then just drops trou
i just sold a bong and some oregano to fifth graders for sixty dollars. doing something tonight?
This was worse than the time that I shot a bald eagle.
he doesnt exactly give off the "im mature enough to use my penis" vibe
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
at one point last night, you were literally auctioning me off. "reeeally drunk hot girl ! we'll start the bidding at an ice cold corona. oh, we have a bidder! do i hear a shot of whiskey? going once, going twice.."
youre welcome
i offered her breakfast shots. she politely declined.
Did you know that taking off a bra with teeth burns ninty calories?
Your life is one shit show away from being a lifetime movie.
I drank beer out of some sort of animal horn all night, then we fucked to a "viking metal" album. I feel like I should go pillage something to complete the Norse trifecta.
I fell out of the car while it was moving then got puked on then puked and cried about then got back in the car and puked out the window when we started moving again
We keep making plans but he keeps getting arrested. Such a tease
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