I drank enough to make her look pretty . . It worked and i threw up while going at it
I can’t believe the potential orgy I left behind at Waffle House.
After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
he said the way to his heart was through his stomach, i told him if he wanted to eat my food he had to eat my kitty
smooth operator
she named each of the players on the last ten madden covers in order and then shotgunned 2 beers...if she doesnt have a penis im in love
the orgasm was like being thrown to the other end of reality, so getting a nosebleed from it wasnt too upsetting at that point
He knows my period schedule but not my work schedule.
We forgot to go back and get the brick YOU WANTED TO BRING INTO THE BAR?
No worries. It'll grow back. I mean, hey, my eyebrows grew back after he shaved them off. So it's all good.
Because selling drugs to kids never goes out of business. We get older, they stay the same stupid.
Almost just stuck my dick in my bong for no reason
You know what a wolf looks like when it kills a small animal? How it shakes it around in it's mouth? I did that to a bag of Taco Bell last night
Iron Man just asked me back to his place... Not sure I can handle this. Wish me luck.
So apparently, after 11 beers, 2 pitchers of sangria and 3 rhum & cokes, the idea of popping a load of MD and jumping on the trampoline, in the woods, in my underwear was the best one ever.
Randomize
