She said to delete the bj video, but I accidentally hit the 'send to her bf' button. My bad
You kept excitedly announcing to the bar what time it was. Followed by an equally excited "Clock language still makes sense!"
We totally just fucked in a closet. These vacations with his family are causing creativity I never thought I had.
apparently he couldn't remember my name so he refereed to me as whats-her-boobs and everyone knew that it was me he was talking about
I am at 2.05 miles in under 11 minutes. So either this thing is broke or I should always work out wasted.
Announcement: Given the sad circumstances regarding the death of my dearest friend Chong the Bong, there will be a brief memorial service for him tomorrow evening at 10:30 at my place. After sharing some memories and sending his spirit off to the great bowl in the sky, we will all take place in the commemoration and maiden voyage of his son, Chong Squared, who eagerly waits to meet all of you. High blessings to you all, piece be with you.
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
I can't even remember the last time I took my own pants off
Doc gave me something stronger than Xanax. The pills have your last name imprinted on them. This cannot be coincidence.
we were looking for paper towels to wrap his hand and i yanked a drawer out of the cabinet, it was fun so we just kept doing it. things escalated and long story short, he isn't gettin his security deposit back
You guys go ahead and have your romantic night. I'm gonna keep my vday tradition alive of angry banging a stranger.
I made out with a guy so that I could get ahead in the bathroom line, totally acceptable
I've spent hours masturbating before. It's actually my favorite Sunday activity
Your slutty phase was the highlight of my year.
You'll probably laugh but I am currently in bed in the fetal position wrapped in only my ninja turtles towel. Save me.
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