pick me up and take me to a bathroom i have to shit
no
the bathroom is right infront of the beerpong table
im sorry you werent invited but you live 2 blocks away PLEASE
Sandra Bullock looks like the most recent Michael Jackson
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
Just pulled over to throw up in a day care parking lot while the kids were outside playing. The adults were mortified.
We were in the shower and he sat down an wouldn't do anything. I'm so glad he manscapes. It made washing his balls less awkward.
I want to be ashamed of the things we do this weekend
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
Walking into the first day of college is like walking into a meat market. A meat market of sex.
I deleted my history right in front of my girlfriend w/out her seeing. Let's go skydiving with no parachutes. I can live thru anything.
Because you work where i will be drunk tonight I'm asking you. Is a shirt required on Halloween?
walk of shame. I'm wearing my rain jacket over my dragon costume. My tail keeps dragging in the rain.
I'm a great relationship counselor. My vagina will let you know if your relationship is gonna work or not.
Told him my main goal was to seduce the man and convince him to leave his wife for me. He didn't argue just asked me to let him know if I succeeded so he didn't waste anymore time not sleeping with the secretary at his office. I have an incredible boyfriend.
& he told me that I give the best head ever.. like can I get that on a medal?
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
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