I left the party when things started to get crazy... and when I say crazy I mean: there was puke on the carpet, Evan was passed out behind a plant, Mary was making out with her ex while her present bf was making out with Nancy. Not to mention that someone fisted the wall. Also - someone is sleeping on your lawn - they might be dead, I didn't check. Later.
Sometimes when I whip my dick out it looks REAL impressive. This, was NOT one of those times.
Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
Just turned elections for the sorority into a drinking game. Right on.
She brought up feelings... her days are numbered
Woke up un the hot tuv. Climbed out fo the hot tub and fell asleeo. Woke ip again in the hot tub.
I found out what happened to that girls weave last night. It was draped over a bush in my backyard.
Actually I think I might be dying right now so if I do you have to drink all my vodka
You're so demanding.
If you feel like laying around and watching a movie, that's where I'll be for the next several hours not moving, blaming others, and generally feeling sorry for myself.
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
Sometimes I just want to kiss you without you pulling ur cock out and waving it at me
Some dude just said my hair smells like his pillows
I almost don't wanna have sex with her because I'm afraid she'll steal my hat
So you're mad that I let you go home with the guy with soft hands but yet you can't understand that I was just trying to help you
so in addition to the two guys I slept with last night, and the third that I turned down this morning, a fourth has appeared. best Valentine's Day ever.
Randomize
