just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
"Tonight I'm turning swine flu into an std" this might be how zombies come about. Peace civilization.
I got to work, greeted my staff, then went into the bathroom to throw up. Who hired me to run a business???
How can he have such a manly penis and baby hands?!
he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend
it felt like i was a kid in an empty playground. i fucked him on every piece of furniture in the house and then when his housemates showed up i was naked in his bed like i'd been there all along.
And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?
Me and the guy at the liquor store are on a first name basis, college is all about networking.
We need to drink more. Just think how awesome it would be to wake up in a trailer and NOT remember how wee got here.
Typing up notes at the bar and doing shots with the bartender until close on a Wednesday. This is what my second year of law school has become.
The 4th is next week. If we don't get to a new level of high, we will be letting down George Washington.
His last Google search was "will sperm ruin the retina display on Apple products?"
I just opened my travel toothbrush holder and it smelled like vodka...maybe a vodka cranberry. This says a lot about my vacations.
How did I end up in some random dudes car?
Some guy came up to you and asked if you knew how to drive stick.
Just told my dad about my heroic mailbox showdown. He looked at me strange. I think he thinks I'm high.
You are high.
Randomize
