Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
i thought i was pinching her nipple. It was her mole
so high and i think i just ordered a magic bullet.
did you call within the first 18 minutes? can i have the free one?
I don't know if its because i'm stoned or what but painting my kitchen yellow makes it look crooked
In the UK. Bar special, every drink costs a pound. I'm two shots away from being deported. God save the queen.
You picked a jagger girl up claimed her then walked out the door with her that was the last we saw of you
I went to the bathroom, came back, and my friend was sleeping leaning up against the stripper pole.
I'm considering having a threesome with my friend just so I can sleep with his boyfriend and not feel guilty about it.
hes like bread. how could bread be dangeous
It was bitter sweet because I woke him up with sex but then I peed in his bed with him in it
Dave is getting a lap dance to the venga boys
this is not a drill
He's giving me the absolute bare minimum amount of attention. Like whatever motherfucker, I've had like six super likes on tinder today
I think you're my feminist conscience sometimes.
A friendship for the ages born on how horny we both are
I know she’s pissed I fucked her husband, but I didn’t know he was married until after I blew him at Legoland
Randomize
