just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
so i just saw your dad embarking upon a biking journey in full reflective gear
...this stays between you and me
It was cool in an 'oh shit I'm gonna get arrested' way.
my tonsil wound opened up during the kegstand but i stopped it with a popsicle
Im positive, your name was on my abdomen, Im pretty sure thats solid evidence
my head gets it he sucks but my LAME FUCKING HEART IN MY VAGINA doesnt
I can't believe he let me cut his hair as stoned as I was.. I think I even cut my own hair too
Mr. Clingalot just ran from our apartment. What the hell?
I started to cry afterward and mumble random things. Examples: "God, please don't make me be so gay anymore" and "my mom is going to be so proud of me for fucking a dude this time." It was that or let him stay the night and cuddle. I mean, fuck that horrible shit I'm a girl that needs her space.
What is their policy on bow ties and belligerence?
Until this weekend, a man hadn't made me orgasm since the night Obama was elected. Now THAT is change I can believe in.
I think if you have sex on the couch it will psychologically damage it.
i swear to god it was like we were fucking in 9 dimensions
I woke up saran wrapped to a chair....
So how was it?
The cemetery or the sex?
There were 16 girls and 31 titties. That’s how the club was. Lance doesn’t get to decide ever again.
Randomize
