dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
they hired a photographer to take a family portrait for grandmas bday gift. we just hired a male stripper. we are def the better grandkids.
apparently he was unaware pussies come in unshaved form. curse you redtube and your unholy lies
It took me 6months to figure out that he only had one testicle.
Yeah? Well I'm currently predrinking downstairs in my room by myself. Absolut and water with a hint of mint because I'm using the glass I keep my toothbrush in. Fuck, you bitches better get off work soon.
No I got myself stoned. With her bowl. She was just a casualty of the War on Sobriety.
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
Why is the clock ticking so loud? Now I know how Captain Hook feels.
No my first time having an orgasm with you will not be on face time
He had a step stool to get in to his bed!
I feel like my toilet water looks different when outsiders use my bathroom...
Are you high right now?
HOW DID YOU KNOW!
I feel like my entire body is ashamed of me today
You're a god amongst men today
you know you're sexually deprived when you're holding a warm taquito in your hand and your vagina starts to tingle
Could’ve gone my whole life not seeing a man snort coke off another man’s cock... but there it is...
She put her coat on went to leave and called me an asshole. I responded with "I never said I wasn't" and then she pounced on me like a cat on cat nip.
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