i felt like cinderella. except at midnight i turned back into a whore.
hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
Can I have my ID back now or are you using it to crossdress again?
you fucked my boyfriend. margarita girls night will not fix this.
hey you forgot your wet suit in my room you can come grab it whenever
I bought a dress specifically for face plant durability... this is how serious I am about my drunk status this weekend
On another note, convinced a 9 year old my hickey was actually a zombie bite.
No we just stood in the kitchen and laughed for 2 hours about how funny the popcorn noise was.
You called me at 3 am laughing like an idiot. Apparently you consider breaking out of the hospital to be a lifetime achievement.
I woke up naked buried in snacks. Best night ever.
I fit in backpacks. BOOM HERE I AM! Like a stripper from a cake.
Even after hearing me fuck his friend twice in one night, he still follows me around like a puppy.
The air taste purple.
Randomize
