no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
so I told him I hadn't been laid since Bush was president. Right after he cums, he says "Welcome to the Obama Administration".
after the cops left he pulled the weed out of his ass and we smoked it
My coke dealer called me at midnight just to ask how to spell a word. Not sure how I should feel about that.
Went to the strip club with my aunt. Do you know how hard it is to be a pervert in front of your female family members?
New high score, I made the stripper choke me while I was getting a lap dance last night
In a weird way, I don't want to stalk him on Facebook. I want to find out what's wrong with him the old-fashioned way. Is this what it means to be romantic?
I clipped one of my extensions in his hair to give him a rat tail. What is my life?
Getting robbed by hookers is def a right of passage in a mans life
I was going to text you that earlier, but I felt like before 10 was probably to early to bring up boners
Well we can add this to the list of 'where the hell did that bruise come from?'
I love you. You know I enjoy the constant sex noises
Dude. If you guys end up really liking each other, the color of his pubes won't matter. I wouldn't break a sweat.
i ordered what the bartender said was called a pink cock, and kept saying it tastes like a disney princess. thats how my 21st bday went
Randomize
