Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
living well may be the best revenge, but it doesn't hurt that my exhusband is now dating a BEAST.
It's like a bag of dicks covered in taint sweat pounding a pregnant baby walrus.
The last thing I remember was you puking all over the inside of my door and him yelling "PUKING RALLY!!!"
Using our apartments online floor/space planner to see how many beer pong tables we can fit. Dont think they had this in mind when they put this thing online.
Probably not lol but were fitting as many as possible
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
I'm sorry, you're actually right. Ostrich racing happens, and they're ridden like a horse. Bewildered and distraught.
Apparently my Ambien addled brain last night actually did decide to go ahead and photoshop you into various animal and human molesting scenarios. That's a hell of a thing to wake up to.
What would you do if your asshole suddenly made the sound of a sheep duck baa/quacking the words kill me
You are so incredibly one of a kind, it's astounding
Just got a 200 dollar safe, two jars, and a 500 pack of rubber bands.. This doesn't SCREAM drug dealer does it?
...you should fill the cart some more
I'm taking a pole dancing class this morning. Can I put you down as my emergency contact? I'm NOT putting my mother
She said it was unconventional for me to yell "Shazam!!" when I came inside her.
Def went to work still drunk... the only comment i got was good to see you drinking more water...
Interesting. All i can really say is humanoid shaped doritos bags melting very slowly
it’s about to be september and all i keep thinking is what if i go (another) full calendar year without having sex?
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