i think im having one of those erections lasting four or more hours
i was picked up off the floor by a stripper, if thats not a new life low then i dont know what is.
he drunkenly pissed himself on the deck, in the bathroom, and on my couch within the span of an hour
its like an avodart commercial...maybe he has a growing problem
I had the spins so badly it was like I was having sex with 2 girls
You know who really doesn't like surpise in-your-face air guitar solos? Strangers.
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
I told him we couldn't hang out because I had strep, he said he's had it once so he couldn't get it again. The sex isn't worth this level of stupidity
There is only one good excuse for how sore I am right now. And that is incredibly acrobatic sex. Unfortunately for me that is not my excuse.
Well im sitting on a futon on a porch at 1:30 in the afternoon drinking boxed wine out of a pint glass next to a chick with a homemade neckbrace. What do you think?
I may be in the process of acquiring a second male fuck buddy and dating a girl....FUCKING STOP THE TRAIN I'M ON! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!!
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
He said the pain stops when I get my shit together and stop being a drugged out alcoholic mess. Could have just said no.
I just want to sing to him and rub baby oil on his head
I had to bail out of the tour de Franzia because I have class Saturday morning. Grad school is ruining my life
You barfed off the front porch while the elderly neighbors were walking their dog. We had to convince them not to call 911.
Pics or it didn't happen.
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