i bet even starving children in Africa take the crust off their poptarts
Home remedy for the herp. Black tea. I need to strap teabags to my wang.
We need somewhere to take these girls. Otherwise it's a orgy in the Mazda.
Forgot to mention there might be a picture of me being thrown in the air while at a Mexican restaurant
That was around the time you tried to kick me out for being rude to your fish.
why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011
His new job just became new places to have sex at.
I just ran into the married chick you banged 2 years ago at our apt! She asked me if I could get her coke! Memories bro. Memories
I think that was him coming out to me. I just brushed it off
Hey I came back and we made joints with the breathalyzers the cops left last night.
Grandpa just put 6 jello shots on his plate. My aunt tried to take them away; he flipped her off. Living in the retirement home has hardened him.
Only I could go on a date with one guy, have a beer with a different guy and go home with the guy im trying to avoid. I have a talent or a problem.
He walked around my apt complex completely naked and started peeing in the maintenance because he thought it was the bathroom. So yeah, pretty drunk.
Now all I have unanswered questions and a fucked up finger
Those brownies did us in. I honestly blacked out completely.
What brownies? Ohmygod.
Randomize
