No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
Thanks for ditching me last night. I got a ride home from the Dominos delivery guy. You owe me 3 large pizzas.
and then the other night his penis tricked us both into sex
I'm masturbating to football. This is why I get guys and you don't
and do you remember when you were dressing me if i had money in my bra?
Turns out I wasn't throwing up blood, I just threw up so hard it ripped my tonsils. Thank you Jameson.
His penis without viagra is what breaks my heart.
I don't know if I should be scared or excited that I can officially drink vodka on the rocks like it's 7up.
There are 18k people at the game and I'm next to the one guy who pulls his underwear down to his ankles to piss.
to improve your porn experience, just imagine a slow speaking older English man narrating it all like a Nature documentary
why is there a chinchilla in our apartment, and where did it come from?
question nothing. DON'T QUESTION A FREE CHINCHILLA.
my god I love twenty year old dicks
yeah the highlight of my day was the 911 operator telling me they had frantically been trying to figure out where i was
WHY THE FUCK DOES RICKY'S BROTHER GET AN ENTIRE POT OF PASTA FOR BEING SHIRTLESS AND ALL I GET IS ARRESTED?!
I FOUND A VIBRATOR IN MY BABY BROTHERS ROOM. IM FREAKIN OUT MAN ITS BIGGER THEN MINE
put it back and chill out ok
NO FUCK HES 15 WHO EVEN SOLD HIM THAT HES A BABY
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