fine. I googled it. you have to eat 5 to die so apparently I'm in the clear.
He kept saying "this is a bad idea" wasn't in his vocabulary. He left at 2 came back at 6 eating frozen waffles and he had a symbol, a moped mirror, and a new MacBook. I'd say he had a good time
i dont know everytime i see her teeth i get erectile disfunction
Do you know anything about the Easter basket sitting on my doorstep filled with porn and peeps?
Swear to god this chicks brother got let out of jail for the weekend for the sole purpose of cock blocking me
Everything tastes like Lysol. Am I dying?
The nurse who basically saved my life just came into the store. Didn't recognize her. Awwwwkward.
You had salsa out and brought a banana on a plate to bed
So I stappled myself into my toga... that should be interesting getting out of later tonight...
Hey do you have any hot friends that would settle for less?
Every time you visit for the weekend I end up having to bleach my entire house after.
Oddly enough I feel totally fine now. Clonazapam and red bull the breakfast of champions.
I'm just gonna back away slowly and come back when there's less weird crap.
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
I absolutely love waking up to see my phone search history is "xj" "qj" "cj" "uj" and "kj"
Randomize
