oh God, I have a dick of a middle schooler
He is an equal opportunity slut.
No, I was feeling sad because all of the other girls were like model-skinny. But then I remembered that I had big boobs and went to hit on their boyfriends.
I just saw a kid walk into class with his dad. Fuck his life.
so many types of cookies right now. i'm eating four kinds of cookies that i've made into larger cookie sandwiches. too high. whoa.
You are the patron saint of my drinking problem.
She ate the cookie then went to the emergency room. Now her fam is pressing charges. Don't people understand you DON'T steal baked goods from potheads??
I used the lotion his mom gave me for christmas to give him a hand job. It felt so wrong.
Pretty sure I can show you the text you sent me stating some interest in my penis entering your mouth if said circumstances were met.
Dear America, sometimes I miss your Everclear and its consequences.
All I've succeeded in doing since I saw you is drool on my shoulder
Just consider it? What else do you have going on today that could be as awesome as a day full of lord of the rings and sex?
I woke up in my tom cruise outfit with my house key tied to my thong....
literally 50% of my time being 20 has involved my genitals thus far
I hit an all time low we ran out of coke and I met up with my dealer at 8 in the morning for a re-up. great customer service though.
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