Apparently mediocre decisions were made last night. I woke up alone in my own bed with my fridge defrosted.
And I didn't go to bed alone. I am buckets of fail.
eating taco bell the same day as formal = probably a bad idea
Just found out Brianna Frost the Pornstar goes to my school. Makes that $35,000 tuition that more valuable.
Also pencil in smooth jazz and illegal activities. The usual.
you tipped EVERY employee at white castle
he described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur
I just wanted to give you a heads up. There's a crab in the kitchen. He doesn't have a name yet. We are just calling him crab for now. Oh! and we have memosas!
I'm buying drugs in the library...And it's not even finals time. What has my life become?
The gay viking and his eqyptian 'queen' hooked up on our couches. They pushed them together to make a bed. Innovative, but awkward to come home from work to at 7 am.
I wish dancing around my house in my bra and underwear to Love Shack whilst eating strawberry cake batter was an acceptable form of exercise.
I've had to much cheese to give a fuck about anything. im tired.
While we were driving she just screams from the backseat: MUMFORD AND SONS DROP THE BANJO and made what were meant to be banjo sound effects
....I feel like you are deciding whether or not I'm good enough for you based on what I ordered from Chipotle.
Aside from having sex with a rando in a toga on george's couch i think taking plan b in the library is the most hashtag college thing i've ever done
hooked up with someone last night while wearing walrus pajama pants. clearly I'm accomplishing big things in life
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