No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
How do you jack off and text at the same time?
On my iPhone they have an app for that
I want to walk on stilts...naked
Please tell me you did not just serenade her with "Let's Get it On"?
Yeah I think it worked. My penis thanks you, Captain Morgan.
looks like were buying each other an abortion for our one year present...
we have a love-hate relationship...we love having sex but hate waking up next to eachother
I'm too tired to go all the way tonight, especially if you're going to quote Katy Perry at me during
She's clinging to me like a horny koala.
The nurse who handed me my discharge papers underlined and highlighted do not consume alcohol while on my painkiller its like she knows me.
I hate find pieces of condom wrappers on carpet. It's like god is throwing flakes of shame for me to vacuum up
She got the hiccups while deep throating me. It was epic. Once in a lifetime experience.
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
i am willing to donate my body to this science experiment when it means free blowjobs
I'm mailing you cans of corn and that's final.
Seltzer and cocaine. Life is flawless right now.
Randomize
