It was awkward until we both realized our obsessions with harry potter and sangrias were the same. Now were in love.
You need tk get a life and stop texting me about fictional characters. I don't give a shit.
winter break is going to suck... i have to put away my college personality and transform into who my parents think i am.
i woke up to find out i shared my bed with a full, open can of natty light last night and didnt spill it. then i drank it for breakfast.
How am I a tease?
Dude you flashed me ur vagina and walked away.
ONLY PART OF IT.
Literally lying on a futon being hand fed bacon
Fuck you.
I woke up and he was just feeling up my stomach. I felt like buddha and he was rubbing my belly for good luck. never again.
cocks speak louder than words, as they say
Nobody says that.
I just had sex in the men's bathroom of a Chinese buffet...
YOU ARE MY HERO
I just remembered I made you punch yourself in the face last night and I would like to formally apologize for that even though it was hilarious.
On the flip side Weston asked if he could move me to Wisconsin to be his "moto hoe" which is actually a thing apparently
Well, I crapped my pants in front of her entire family, was laughed out of their house, and I had to walk home with shit stained pants. So, yeah, it went really well.
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
Vomit your little heart out. You've got a long day tomorrow
my vagina can't handle any more of our 4 day long smash bash. it should be like a holiday or something. should only happen once a year.
I think I'm taking after my dog, I just want to hump everything
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