oh my god im such an asshole. i just asked the guitarist of bad religion if he was a scalper.
We have nothing in common but the sex rocks, would it be awful to develop a drug habit just to have a topic of conversation?
we flagged you as soon as you tried to put the lime in the microwave to prove it was really a kiwi. again.
I found him CRAWLING across the garden. He saw me,smiled,and asked for a napkin.
Ugh why does it have to be margarita Monday. Why can't it be pants off dance off beer pong but with jager Monday.
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
Also adulthood=replacing meals with bourbon. And not getting your hair caught in a fan.
We can't be fuck buddies. You stare into my eyes while we fuck.
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
We all have to be good at something. Mine are writing, drinking, fucking and peer pressure.
If I do nothing else today, the fact that I talked you into this is achievement in itself.
That was a very uncomfortable conversation to have without pants on. But his mom was pretty cool about it.
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
I need to start journaling my drunk thoughts. Drunk me is fucking brilliant & sober me is missing out.
JUST BECAUSE I ANSWER THE DOOR NAKED CARRYING A BOTTLE OF RUM DOESN'T MEAN YOU CAN STARE NEIGHBORS.
Randomize
