u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
i'm almost done photoshopping my face on his wife. it's a done deal
Motor boating, judging by the amount of lipstick I found I would say between 6 to 8 times
remember last year when i left for the bar in flip flops and came back in heels?
it happened again.
Clearly he doesn't understand my need to be surrounded by cats at all times
that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
I feel like it'll be a success as long as she doesn't end up dead in a ditch. There has to be a line somewhere.
Vegas is great, yelled at a guy 4 lanes over if he wanted a bj. ended up having sex in a vacant lot. I think he was homeless.
See I would make a great girlfriend. My surprises are sex and burritos. What else do guys want
Probably won't be invited back there again considering last time his purebred corgi ate my pot brownie and had to be rushed to the hospital.
Happy hour crawl turned into power happy hour turned into tequila shots turned into I'm drunk in class on Cinco de Mayo at 7 am.
He plays guitar, sings like an angel, and acts like a gentleman. If I don't fuck him by the end of first semester, I'm dropping out
Haha I wasn't coming anyway. I'm watching Snow White and don't want to put pants back on. Those are completely unrelated. Have a good night.
he's drunk and referred to his shoes as foot condoms
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
Randomize
