OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
Did you ever notice the eye of Sauron looks like Lindsay Lohan's vagina?
He offered but I said no. I didn't think it'd be cool to accept cupcakes in the mens room of a gentlemans club.
Hands down the most disgusting picture message ever received. Thank you.
im here for your entertainment
But it's not about our feelings, it's about making the men we sleep with feel awful about their lives
I just found a list in your handwriting titled "Places I've Peed." The National Mall and 'under the second bridge after the bend in the road' are two of the tamer entries. I tip my hat.
...if you're living vicariously thought me, that was a great blow job you just gave in the B&N parking lot.
Seriously your house is like the underground railroad for unwanted gay kids
You were so drunk you coat checked your shoe... Not even both of them. Just one shoe.
He added me to his contacts as 'boot and rally'...have you ever been more proud to be related to me?
I can't wait to tell mom.
I just imagined myself as R2-D2 and you as C3P0 walking around the Vegas desert looking for alcohol
He's a 30 yr old man who voluntarily goes by Stevie and his job title is "Jumbotron Operator". There's a 97.5% chance he lives in his mom's basement. STOP THIS NOW!!!
Today I learned I and my bar naps were the subject of a bar meeting.
I took out a life ins. policy Thursday. It's okay I can die in Nashville now.
Randomize
