everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
i was rollin on her like bob the builder
for halloween i should be pregnant. what is scarier than that?!
i dunno what you eat but your cum is all over my underwear and it smells like pretzels
obviously my correlation between being a pro surfer and being extremely good in bed was 100% wrong.
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
I think this breakup is Gods way of telling me I deserve a bigger dick
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
don't tell me about being eco-friendly. i just threw up in the same bag i bought my liquor in. RECYCLING
I'd like to thank you for ensuring I didn't die. Id also like to show you the most impressive bruise you will perhaps ever see
the worst fight me and my gf ever had was over Guy fieri
I know he's only a bandaid for my emotional disrepair, but he can stick me anytime!!
He asked when the last time I had sex was. I had to look at the clock and respond "12 hours ago"
I wore the clothes I got arrested in last night to work today.....there is no where but up from here!
Maybe if you would fuck your boss you would get string cheese too
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