good call on bringing her. it's always good to invite chicks who mix booze and prescription drugs.
i have a reoccuring irrational fear i'm going to walk in on my dad masterbating. Night.
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
"reccomended dose" hasn't been in my vocabulary for quite some time.
We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.
Well, I wanted to be you for Halloween but I couldn't fit seven dicks in my mouth.
I have no idea why I said that. I have no idea why anything happened last night, I broke my toaster making a egg. I'm going to quit drinking.
I sat down next to him and my bra just unhooked itself
Everyone was passed out so I turned off the lights and locked all the doors. I also took the chicken sandwich in the microwave as payment.
Blow jobs in the hobby lobby parking lot, oh lawd there gonna pray for me when they review those tapes ...
Apparently chalking everything I've done these past 48 hours to the fact that it was homecoming, is like a "get out of jail free" card.
Go forth my friend, but don't do any of that fruitful and multiplying shit.
He told me he loved me...but added "you crazy bitch" at the end. Does it still count???
I legitimately just had to leave work because I am too hungover. The front office ladies keep making fun of me.
yeah, my mom got it for me because it had animals AND alcohol.
Randomize
