they told me her nickname is "wizard sleeve"
pick me up NOW
she moaned out jack bauer's name while i was banging her...
apparently breaking a beer bottle and then throwing up in a urinal is a terrible way to pick up girls.
yeah, we figured out that passing a joint between cars was a pretty bad idea
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
what customs doesn't know wont hurt them
And some old guy told me Jesus loves me and I laughed super hard and told him sinning is fun. Hahaha
Look man, sometimes you just gotta say "Sure! Why not? I can always take a shower afterwards"
And after that you guys started calling arbor mist "breakfast juice"
you haven't really lived until you are in a situation where your vagina is hanging out
He was literally going down on me and giving me a foot rub AT THE SAME TIME. What more can I ask for?
I've just been thinking about sangria a lot lately, like an adult.
Why can't burritos get me drunk
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
It occurred to me today, whilst I was on the phone to boyfriend number 1, whilst in the car with boyfriend number 2 who was dropping me at the shops to meet boyfriend number 3 to help me buy a present for boyfriend number 4 that I should be having much more sex than I am.
Randomize
