i just saw my boxers from 2 days ago stuck in a tree 4 miles from my house
he spent the whole night trying to convince me into a2m. i won't even use the pb til i clean the jelly knife. i love him but it's not going to happen.
Its like im going on a blind date, but ive already had sex with her
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
Only sluts go out in this weather carpe diem boys
I'm just crazy horny about you
I'm going through a really dark time right now
I don't want to hear it man. I just jerked it to a pic of my ex wife in a bikini. Buck up
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
like stop just cause your whole life has been one enormous reject pile does not mean that i have to suffer too
can I cover your dick in cookie butter?
I literally woke up walked into the bathroom, threw up and died this morning. Then went to my 8am.
At least life still wants to fuck me.
No more pre-dentist shots, I just puked on my hygienist
Of all of my friend's husbands, I like when yours hits on me best
Awe that means so much to us
Highlight your past hook-ups. You've been stabbed, shot at, run over, and chased down the road...no you can't bring new bar bitch over here!
Dude she has a friend!!!!
Randomize