How many pudding cups do I have to eat for it to count as dinner?
4.
yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
You kept whispering, no one does me like Jimmy Johns does me.
And then the lady sheeps would bring me the finest grass to eat cuz im the sheep king and id have sexy smooth sheep fur
a kid puked on the floor and instead of, you know, cleaning it they cut a square out of the carpet with a boxcutter and threw it outside
Your penis chewing exercise is not working
My sister hid me from my parents, brought me a bloody mary, and told my girlfriend I was out with my dad. For 13, I got to say she's working out pretty good.
There's puke on my pillow. I'm still wearing my wedges. And I have a cab drivers number clutched in my fist.
I dont know about you but I'm not getting out of bed this summer for anything but food or sex
I just told him that with every paper, I'd take a picture of myself with one less piece of clothing. Who say's I can't be a tutor?
Vodka and Jamison is not a mixed drink
Do you think you can chase a shot with chicken soup?
It may be a clusterfuck, but I'll be looking classy as shit as I watch the nightmare unfold
the cop found his r2d2 bong and asked me if i ever smoked out of him. i'm like, no sir. he's like ahh. if i were to smoke, it'd definitely be out of some star wars character.
easily made my night.
If you wear a peguin suit you MUST send me a picture!!!
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