I'm in a trailer park. But I'm not scared. The virgin always lives.
she literally hasn't taken the mardi gras beads off in three days. she showered in them. TWICE.
Call me when you get off. I have stories about black lesbians in jail begging to braid my hair...
My bed is full of blood and feathers
I was stalking his twitter and saw that he used punctuation in a hashtag. Thank god we didn't work out because I can't be with someone that incompetent
I found her in my pantry with her shirt off twerking...I tapped her on the shoulder and she said she was giving Chef Boyardee a show and to give her a minute...
We hooked up in his car and afterwards he cried. I think I need to find a new hookup...
It just smells like spaghetti and despair.
You woke up butt naked, peed yourself said something about jumbo shrimp, and passed back out 10 seconds ltr..
a guy just walked through our campsite, crouched down by the truck, screamed "ACID ONLY LASTS FOR 8 HOURS RIGHT?!", then ran off into the bushes
You don't have issues. You're a consenting adult having sex at work. Go you.
I am rewearing my dress from last night. I only wore it for like two hours before fucking. And I took it off first so no cock contact. This is my new standard of cleanliness.
Fuck it, i havent messed around in half a year. I have sexual tension with a fire hydrant.
Should I be concerned that he called me mom when I got in bed on top of him?
After he finished, he fell on the floor and whispered "finally satisfied"
Randomize
