I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
you threw your tampon into someones open car window...while they were driving.
I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
You threw up with your ski mask on still.
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
he told me it was like eating gods vagina.
umm, I just masturbated to old Justin timberlake on MTV jams. in need of dick ASAP
You wouldn't believe how many pro-life stickers, and "show us your tits" signs there are between here and Dallas.
i liked you for your lack of ambition and abundance of weed
If you bet guys that you can drink them under the table they will pay for your drinks all night until they pass out. I have this down to a science that I think even my dad would appreciate.
I had a spiritual reading tonight and my dead grandmother called me a whore.
I smell like Dick and happiness
Hammered...8am...why is there chickens in the living room?
That chick keeps sending eggplant emojis
Welcome to dating in the digital age. Better catch up now that you’re divorced
and eggplant is code for penis. It means she’s DTF. Go get her tiger!!!
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