he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
I just mixed tequila and nyquil in front of dad. hes making ambulance jokes but let me tell you its DELICIOUSSS
The best part was her genuine shock and total "I didn't know" look when we said she couldn't cook a steak in a microwave.
I would do laundry with you but I vaguely remember swallowing all my quarters last night as some kind of trick.
So you used a whole package of smoked meat last night. Didn't eat it, just took it out and put it all over the fridge.
You are so lucky that drugs are going to kill you before I do.
If she doesn't judge me for bringing my vibrator in the tanning bed, I know she is a true friend.
Oh you know, watching its always sunny and petting his cat and NOT fucking. I'm starting my whorefree 2012 resolution early.
I mean, you've seen me eat pizza, sober, out of a garbage can, and yet I refuse to go eat at that place. Just sayin....
Is it wrong that I get drunk and let him eat me out then fall asleep? He offers me so much and yet I do nothing. I feel like a republican.
I found the guy I hooked up with last night on Wikipedia, at least now I know how old he is.
I expect you will be there for a drunken 3way with my husband again this new year.
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
We were too tired to finish having sex so we just stopped to eat the cheesecake and passed out. I didn't mind
I went to steal condoms from your room and all I could find was chik fil a sauce
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