I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
Would you like me to write a persuasive essay on how you should let me suck your dick?
yeah, that's what i said too. right before i tackled that street sign.
everyone at work keeps looking at me like they know I got the herp this weekend
Mystery lines found in a Pyrex dish in the back of my pantry at 415 am. No recall as to it's origin. Unidentifiable taste. Obviously I'm doing them
I guess I just laid down next to him with the entire pot of mac n cheese and started giving him a handie with one hand and eating with the other
Heard in class today that they replaced our carpet in last years apartment because they couldn't get the smell out, dude we smoked way to much pot last year.
WHY DO YOU ALWAYS PUT THE PLUG IN THE SINK BEFORE YOU PUKE IN IT
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
Yuck. My throat feels like someone chucked a couple of Maltov cocktails down it and finished it off with a super soaker filled with Jameson.
I had her buy me a cock ring, so we might test that out. We are presently playing yahtzee.
Cock rings and yahtzee. Like peanut butter and jelly.
So I had sex in the woods today. Anything else that happened today? Irrelevant. It was a GOOD day.
That's a gentle way of saying I passed out like an 18-year-old on his first trip to Tijuana
Legit sprained my cooter. No joke. Icing her down as we speak.
don't take this the wrong way, but I'm not drunk but I need you to take me to the ER and you're the most likely to not be drunk now.
Randomize
