Hey guys, just to let you know, I have a boyfriend...so that hookup was kind of a one time thing.
was that a mass text??
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
We need somewhere to take these girls. Otherwise it's a orgy in the Mazda.
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
Dipping doritos in ranch. Why doesn't he love me?
Hey.. Here's a thought for the evening. There's only two more sleeps until I fuck you so hard my back teeth will convulse.. Here's too Tuesday! Woohooooo
I am 100% planning on being drunk on Wednesday. This is America. Work or no work.
Someone touched my vagina when we were out last night. The fact that it was you is inconsequential and I am still counting it as a pull.
Some girl at my gym just tried to casually drop the fact she can kegel 3 lbs...
i fell into a bathtub last night and broke the fall with my forehead. my forehead is bruised
What alcohol should i drink Saturday to completely hate life?
Okay, yeah, judgmental guy at 7/11. I'm buying g wine at 10:20 in the morning. You wanna fight about it?
Money making scheme, blow job proof mascara. Waterproof is bullshit
So I took my bra off and threw it in the bushes before we went to the bars..
Can you see if my straightener is in your refrigerator?
Yes. Its here..
Randomize
