He lasted like 30 seconds. With a condom. I just expected more from the president of a frat.
Just took my morning after pill in the library
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
he peed everywhere. it's like having a puppy.
He waited until after foreplay to tell me that he didn't have a condom and "we" would just have to settle for a bj tonight...
He said he wanted to go to France " just to piss in the nice areas". I want to fuck him.
Oh fuck. There is like a human shit on the sidewalk. I hate this place.
I can't tell if I'm getting better at doing my online spanish hw drunk or if my teacher is just grading on creativity. Either way that senoritas gettin an applebees gift card when i graduate.
I'm adopting to save the world from the moral outrage that would be my offspring
No worries, I've prioritized my homework into "can do drunk" and "should be sober" categories. We're good.
I'm recreating the you're a wizard harry video with a guy on snapchat whilst having snapchat sex with another... Adulting is fun
Yeah well I just had an orgasm on my bathroom floor so there's a first for everything I guess
my birth father cheated on his wife with my birth mother. it's literally in my blood to be a home wrecker.
it's 1043 pm. still havent changed out of the shirt i wore last night so at this point i figure i'll go for twosies.
She puked on the floor because she said she really liked to clean.
Randomize
