drug dealer added me on facebook, win ?
omg no way im finding him!
he has no pics of his face, and im always drunk so i cant remember if hes cute or not, but he told me im in his phone as "party girl" which is fitting i guess cause im dragging my hungover ass to buy preggo tests, and i had to get the cheap ones cause i blew all my cash on coke.
I just had to explain to my father, how having two screens plugged into my computer doesn't use more internet.
I'd suck anything for a pizza right now
I'm at a free clinic. Feel like I should cough or sneeze so it's not blatantly obvious I'm getting checked for STI's.
I feel like college is just an experience in what names I can't name my future son.
the "its better than getting an actual virus from an actual porn star" argument failed.
Fyi when u order four mini bottles of scotch on a 45 min flight. The flight attendants jaw drops to the floor.
Yes I want to fuck your friends but it's out of respect and love for you.
PRINCE HARRY WAS AT WAL MART SO NEXT TIME YOU BITCH ABOUT GOING TO WAL MART REMEMBER THAT EVEN PRINCE HARRY GOES TO WAL MART.
No it's okay, we're just driving to random places with the portable stripper pole and causing a ruckus.
Oh that's normal
You're such an expert partier. I feel like 22-year-old recent graduates should have to intern with you.
I'm a pro at the other 9-5
I gave you the craziest sex experiences of your life, the least you could do is let me keep the sweater.
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
Where the fuck are you? I just got punched in the nose by a tourist
Sometimes, it’s important to take a moment and kinkshame yourself.
Randomize
